Herbie, the animated car, was built by Brother Gail Love of Clermont. Florida.  He and his dear wife Charlotte use it as a witnessing tool for Christ.  You may visit their site at www.stephensherbie.com.

A MERRY HEART

"A merry heart maketh a cheerful countenance: " Proverbs 15:13 . . . "A merry heart doeth good like a medicine:"    Proverbs 17:22

Friends often send me articles that make me smile. I call them SMILEYS.  None of these smileys are original with me and the sources are unknown.  May they cause a smile on your face like they did mine.  They will be changed occasionally so please come back for a smiley!

WHEN I'M A LITTLE OLD LADY
Then I'll live with my children and bring them great joy.
To repay all I've had from each girl and boy
I shall draw on the walls and scuff up the floor;
Run in and out without closing the door.

I'll hide frogs in the pantry, socks under my bed.
Whenever they scold me, I'll hang my head.
I'll run and I'll romp, always fritter away
The time to be spent doing chores every day.

I'll pester my children when they are on the phone.
As long as they're busy I won't leave them alone.
Hide candy in closets, rocks in a drawer,
And never pick up my clothes from the floor.

Dash off to the movies and not wash a dish.
I'll plead for allowance whenever I wish.
I'll stuff up the plumbing and deluge the floor.
As soon as they've mopped it, I'll flood it some more.

When they correct me, I'll lie down and cry,
Kicking and screaming, not a tear in my eye.
I'll take all their pencils and flashlights, and then
When they buy new ones, I'll take them again.

I'll spill glasses of milk to complete every meal,
Eat my banana and just drop the peel.
Put toys on the table, spill jam on the floor,
I'll break lots of dishes as though I were four.

What fun I shall have, what joy it will be,
To live with my children.... the way they lived with me!
 

HOW TO PRESERVE A HUSBAND
First, use care in selection.

Get one that is not too young, but is tender and healthy, if you choose one recklessly it may not keep.

Don’t put in hot water – this makes them turn sour.

Sweeten with smiles and spice with patience. All varieties will respond.

To insure a wonderful consistency, stir gently – never beat!

And don’t leave unattended for long periods of time.

To add a delicious flavor, sprinkle generously with praise and appreciation. The poorest specimen may be improved if you follow these instructions, and will keep for an unlimited number of years in any climate.

CAUTION: frequent exposure to cold temperatures has been known to damage this dish permanently, keep a small but steady flame going at all times.

 GOING TO BED
Mom and Dad were watching TV when Mom said, I'm tired, and it's getting late.  I think I'll go to bed. She went to the kitchen to make sandwiches for the next day's lunches, rinsed out the popcorn bowls, took meat out of the freezer for supper the following evening, checked the cereal box levels, filled the sugar container, put spoons and bowls on the table and started the coffee pot for brewing the next morning.

She then put some wet clothes in the dryer, put a load of clothes into the wash, ironed a shirt and secured a loose button.  She picked up the game pieces left on the table and put the telephone book back into the drawer.  She watered the plants, emptied a wastebasket and hung up a towel to dry.  She yawned and stretched and headed for the bedroom.  She stopped by the desk and wrote a note to the teacher, counted out some cash for the field trip, and pulled a textbook out from hiding under the chair.  She signed a birthday card for a friend, addressed and stamped the envelope and wrote a quick note for the grocery store.  She put both near her purse.

Mom then creamed her face, put on moisturizer, brushed and flossed her teeth and trimmed her nails.  Hubby called, "I thought you were going to bed."

"I'm on my way," she said.  She put some water into the dog's dish and put the cat outside, then made sure the doors were locked.  She looked in on each of the kids and turned out a bedside lamp, hung up a shirt, threw some dirty socks in the hamper, and had a brief conversation with the one up still doing homework. In her own room, she set the alarm, laid out clothing for the next day, straightened up the shoe rack.  She added three things to her list of things to do for tomorrow.

About that time, the hubby turned off the TV and announced to no one in particular, "I'm going to bed." And he did.

Anything extraordinary here?  Wonder why women live longer?
CAUSE WE ARE STRONGER.......MADE FOR THE LONG HAUL.

WHO DOES WHAT
A man and his wife were having an argument about who should brew the coffee each morning.  The wife said, "You should do it, because you get up first, and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee."  The husband said, "You are in charge of cooking around here and you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my coffee."  Wife replies, "No, you should do it, and besides, it is in the Bible that the man should do the coffee." Husband replies, "I can't believe that, show me." So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament and showed him at the top of several pages, that it indeed says.......... "HEBREWS

WOMEN'S REVENGE
"Cash, check or charge?" I asked, after folding items the woman wished to purchase.  As she fumbled for her wallet I noticed a remote control for a television set in her purse.  "So, do you always carry your TV remote?" I asked.  "No," she replied, "but my husband refused to come shopping with me, and I figured this was the most evil thing I could do to him legally."